So, yeah, it’s me in the picture. This is the culmination of a boatload of different emotions and still trying to muster myself to get ready for another fight.
GRAPHIC CONTENT AHEAD
On the 15th of this month, I went under anesthesia for a biopsy of my uterus and bladder. I am not the most patient person when it comes to waiting for results, but I waiting until Friday to check.
So, on the 19th, I logged onto my medical chart to see if my biopsy results were posted. Four days was long enough, right?
After going through the motions to prove I was who I said was, I clicked on the link to see my results.
The cancer had progressed…
I forgot to breathe. My heart stopped. I felt the sting of tears welling up in my eyes. I don’t know how long I was staring at the results. All I remember was wondeirng what I done in my life to deserve a disease that is nothing but a bad penny, a boat load of pain, and sorrow to everyone who had lost a loved one to this blight.
Now, I have to wait for the follow-up…
May 30th seems like an eternity away when you’re waiting for what’s next regarding your treatment options.
My oncologist told me my possibilites before scheduling the biopsy. None of them sounded too good, but I know one of them will be presented when I go.
I have run the gambit of emotions, denial, frustration, anger, acceptance, and somewhere in all that I found the will to buck up and the resovle to fight it one more time.
Although this may be a life-long fight, I had to meet it head-on no matter what comes next. I am going to be 50 this year, and I’ll be damned if I am not going to celebrate it.